I knew my marriage would end before it began — El-Rufai’s ex-wife

Halima Nwakego, former wife of Bashir El-Rufai, son of former Kaduna State Governor Nasir El-Rufai, has opened up about her divorce, single parenthood, heartbreak and living with attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder.

Halima and Bashir, son of the former governor, married in 2020 and welcomed twin boys the following year.

Bashir announced the end of their marriage in 2024, attributing the breakdown to what he described as “Gen Z wahala.” He later apologised publicly over the manner in which he announced the separation.

In a post on her Substack, Memoirs of a Single Nigerian Twin Mum with ADHD, Halima disclosed that the marriage officially ended in July 2024.

Reflecting on her experience, the mother of two said she had always been sceptical about marriage and believed the relationship would eventually end even before it began.

“Imagine entering a marriage already preparing for its funeral,” she wrote.

Halima said her outlook on relationships was shaped by her upbringing, where she grew up believing that men were supposed to provide safety and security.

Despite her reservations about men, she said she remained deeply optimistic about love.

“For someone with so little faith in men, I have a ridiculous amount of faith in love,” she wrote.

She also revealed that she fell in love with another man several months after her divorce, but the relationship eventually ended in heartbreak.

“There is a saying that men will stain your white,” she wrote.

Using her preference for white clothing as a metaphor, Halima compared her continued belief in love to wearing white despite knowing it could easily become stained.

Her reflections also touched on her experience as a single mother raising twins, her business ventures and her journey of navigating life after divorce while managing ADHD.